Israel Vasquez Jr.

I’ve made some very poor judgment in the past, and because of such, I’ve made “mistakes”, like all us humans tend to do from time to time.  The problem with mine is that it not only affects me directly, but it affects everyone around me, the people that love me and that I Love.

It also directly affects some innocent little people, yes … my kids: Cristian and Clarése.  See, let me tell you a story of how I came about with these 2 very lovely, unique and beautiful kids.  Like every young person does at some point in time; I fell madly in love. She was my friend, we courted, we “fell in love” or that was what I thought.  But like all relationships do, they tend to end.  And I was so heartbroken, when this person decided to leave.  If you have ever been madly in love and not corresponded, you would know what I’m talking about.  I wanted to self destruct, in fact I consciously almost did.  I got into drinking, partying, and I even got myself into an accident, thinking it would be easier to die quickly, cowardly and painlessly than to suffer this disease of the heart.

As you can see by me writing this blog that like a cat, yours truly has nine lives! I lived to get over that broken heart, and continued “enjoying” my life.  And one of those nights partying, I met her; yes… the mother of my kids.

Now, I don’t know what possessed me to go up and ask her to dance that night, I still can’t explain the weird attraction I felt to her.  I blame my poor judgment, I have no choice.  From there it escalated to a whirlwind semi-relationship (if there’s such a thing), where we were only together to enjoy the moment, to live for the day without thought about anything else not even our non-existent feelings.  I didn’t love her, she didn’t love me either.  We didn’t know what love was.

I’m not sure who to blame more, the poor products of those conniving pharmaceutical companies (she claims she was on the pill) or my super sperm.  Either way Cristian was conceived into this non-existent relationship, we didn’t want to anything to do with each other after those 3am weekend nights.  But nevertheless I managed to convince her that we should try and give this baby a family, and I did my first big mistake… which was moving in together because “of the baby”, even though there was no mutual love.

As you can guess, it didn’t work, we were constantly fighting and arguing, all the while Cristian was getting bigger and understanding everything (I swear these kids come with the equivalent of dual core cpu micro-chips nowadays, when I was born we were still only at Pentium 3).  It culminated with charges of domestic violence (false, I must clarify) and me spending a night behind bars.  It was when I decided I’ve had enough, and moved out, with the thought in my mind that it was better this way, rather than have the kid grow traumatized in a dysfunctional relationship.

I thought I would be able to move on, and take care of my kid and still be a good father to him. But it would prove to be a challenge. The independent, do it herself, girl that I had met that night at that bar, had become quite dependent on me. And I was bound to this false sense of responsibility to her, so I took care of her financially.  It was six months of living hell.

I wasn’t living for me anymore, I was paying 2 bills, 2 rents, etc, I practically couldn’t spend 25$ on myself. But that wasn’t the end of that, it seems that not only was I bound financially but emotionally also (The Learning Channels’ theory explains that we humans are bound to one another by some emotional hormones that we transmit during coitus. i.e. the more we fuck, the more we’re fucked cause it ties us emotionally to each other, even if out of sex we don’t want to be).

I’m really beginning to think I really do have Super Sperm ™ (note the trademark, this time she claims it’s the injection that failed).  Clarése was conceived apparently before I had fully moved out, but by the time I found out, I had already moved out and was not living with her anymore. After going through hell and high water for my son, for whom I had to go as far as Family court to maintain some semblance of a relationship which proved to be an arduous and emotionally draining process, I had made another poor judgment and this baby was on the way.

Nevertheless, after my court case, I felt so relieved that my faith in the English legal system (that powers our Legislation) was restored because they had ruled in my favor for access and visitation rights.  I decided it was time I moved on and started living again.  As I tend to do this “young man in a hurry” as certain people have characterized me: moved immediately on.  In August 2009, a bit after my case was finished, and 3 months before Clarése was born, I met this wonderful, beautiful and very special Girl (with a capital G).

The rest is history as they say, I started living again (as Cliché as it may sound). I felt life had purpose, and for the first time I felt truly happy and contented; and very much in LOVE. I had found the one person, who understood me, and who because of what she had also been through in her past knew what it is to hurt, to suffer, to be angry, and we knew we just wanted to be good together; we’d be each other’s cure.

And that is where we are now; though I can’t say it was all a fairytale, it was far from it though it was still so good that it felt like a little slice of heaven.  I think we went through a very tumultuous beginning, something no other relationship had been through, but it didn’t matter, because we were sure about each other and though there were at times doubts that ran through our minds, we knew in the end it would all be good.  Things would work out.

We are in Love.

Fast forward to now, a rainy Sunday afternoon, trying to enjoy a movie with my Loves.  And my world is rocked upside down again. The witch had decided that she can’t do it on her own, that they, my kids … are better off with me.  Now, I don’t know what to think, I don’t know whether to believe her or not.  Until I have a legal document before my eyes with her signature on it, I will know if it’s true and I will be contented.

Nevertheless, a part of me can’t help but hope. You see that is what I’ve wanted all along. In my mind I have failed them as a Father too much already. Having brought them into this world without so much as a thought to all that they would have to suffer without a proper family unit, without a proper upbringing.  I believe that to countenance this, to give them a proper family, I have to start again, have them with me, try to somehow stitch together some sort of semblance of a proper upbringing.  I re-iterate, I believe this can only happen if they are with me. Because her mother, try as much as she can, and put up as much fight as she does, cannot give them the upbringing they deserve.

So it is where I am, I’m hoping without hoping too much.  Knowing that like the line in the poem that inspires the title for John Steinbeck’s famous book:  “The best laid schemes of mice and men Go often askew”.

Best explained by these lines quoted from Wikipedia:

“The connotation is that even when you mean no harm and have pure intentions, you can destroy somebody else’s well laid plans. Life is unpredictable, and while preparing for the unpredictable future we are not enjoying the present moment - which the mouse seems to be able to do. The narrator reminisces on “prospects drear,” i.e. bad events that have happened in the past which in some ways prevent him from moving on. Furthermore, some say that he is very fearful of the future and that these two reasons do not allow him to enjoy the present.”

And so I stand, as I conjure a plan to not plan, a choice when there is none to make.  I will only live the present moment and enjoy them.  It will work out; deep down I know everything will.

The only thing I have to do, which can best be compared to my dad calling me and asking me to go boil the pot of beans so as for the “beans to not spoil”. Is just that, don’t let the beans spoil. Live life and enjoy every minute of it, but don’t let it go bad.

It is what it is, this our thing, “Of Beans and Men”.

In a certain twist of events this year, August… my birth month… the month that normally is the worst of the year for me was quite agreeable with me. Normally i’m either depressed or go through some kind of drama during this month.

This year it was far from it… I got new work/projects, i’m doing ok financially, i finalized the issue with my son and his Mom (case closed, i get him every 2 weeks, and i’m glad i finalized things with his Mom as it would never have worked out), I bought a New car, I even met a new, very special girl, and on top of that, I got the confirmation that in October, i will have another girl in my life! Yes, i’m becoming a dad for the second time and this time i’m having a Daughter.

I can only truly say, thank you August! i enjoyed and appreciated all that you brought to me… i’m still not sure if i’m looking to you next year though!

I have been a silent spectator of the BPFL Insurance Cup this season.  I watched as Verdes started the season in dismal fashion, losing against Newcomers Nizhee Corozal and several others.  I watched as they lost against Cruz Azul 12-0 in agregate.  And i knew something was wrong, this wasn’t the Hankook Verdes of last year, the verdes that fought to the last in the championship, something was wrong.

Apparently a lot was wrong. Amongst it all: dissent among the players and manager Sergio Chuc.  It started with the return game at Guatemala. Apparently some of the players decided not to travel with the team, claiming sickness among other excuses.  This did not appease the manager and he Suspended them, for the entire season it seems.  The problem is that the players suspended were not any players, but their star players: Orlando “Leech” Jimenez, his younger brother Danny Jiminez and National Team Player Trevor “Burger” Lennon.

Apparently the excuses were false, and they just decided to boycott the game in Guatemala for patriotic reasons.  A move that angered the manager citing that “They don’t have the team as their first priority”.  This spat went public when Sergio, wrote back to the Amandala sports desk in response to an article congratulating Orlando & the other players for not going.  And now Leech, the captain has spoken back by writing to the sports desk. He’s told his side of the story, he didn’t want to play not because of money, but because of other reasons.

What does this mean for our/my beloved team this season, simply that if Leech & the others don’t return by the next game, Verdes is doomed for the season, not being able to make it to the playoff’s and therefore finishing the season in dismall form.  If Leech and the others do come back, which he’s hinted he will, it will still be a very difficult task for them to qualify to the play offs and more than likely all of this will affect the players and i honestly don’t think they will be able to defend their title this season.

As for me, I’m sitting this season out. I havn’t been to a single game this season, partially because of other duties, especially with my company and also because of Verdes’ dismall form and because of the Absence of Leech & Danny.  I am a Verdes die hard fan as anybody who knows me can tell you, and will support the team in hard times and good times.. .but i hope the empty seats & the dismal result tell Sergio something, Verdes needs its star players, and yes the Club is bigger than any player, but as you have heard Leech say “Their blood runs Green”… swallow the pride and save the club some embarrasment.

Quick Facts:

Yes Hankook Verdes lost against Cruz Azul on a total 12-0 scoreline.

Yes i was dissapointed.

Yes Cruz Azul were the better team

Yes Cruz Azul fans you can go ahead and pile it up on me.

But mind you, i did not ever say Verdes is capable of beating Cruz Azul. Rather i said i think they have a chance to compete and surprise them. Unfortunately it wasn’t so.  Cruz Azul just proved how much class they have over our little semi-pro team.  Fact: Cruz Azul one of the best mexican teams, Verdes small semipro team

Apart from that i was excited in seeing Chivas & N.E. Revs get their butts kicked by little Joe Public & Tauro F.C.

I think the Concacaf Champions League will be very exiting still with the smaller teams on the roster (even though Hankook Verdes is not there). I will definately watch the other games and certainly expect and upset or two! maybe Cruz Azul getting their asses kicked? :-)

Hello Hankook Verdes Fans!

This is Israel from israel.com.bz, www.red4.bz and www.verdes.bz

This email serves as a reminder that Hankook Verdes plays Cruz Azul
today at 8 P.M Belize time and it will be shown live on Telefutura.
If you’re in Belize City thats Channel 97 on C.B.C Cable

We had hoped to launch the Official Verdes Website at www.verdes.bz
but unfortunately we were not able to receive all the content
necessary from the team co-ordinators to launch the site. However
we have spoken to them and have agreed to the launching of the site
as soon as possible.  Hopefully we can do so before the return game
which is set to be played in Jalapa, Guatemala on Sept. 3rd.

So to all you who are looking for information on the sites and on
google please rest assured that we are working on getting as much
info out.

In the meantime enjoy the game tonight!

Israel, Amilcar & Verdes.bz

http://www.channel5belize.com/#a14

Above is the link to Channel 5’s James Adderly take on the weekend game that saw Verdes defeat Super League Champions Texmar Boys to become Belize’s Champions of Champions. That means, they have won the B.P.F.L league and defeated the super league (the 2nd semi-pro league of Belize).  I knew Verdes was to win, but i hear Texmar boys gave a great game.

In other news, talks are in with Sergio Chuc & Verde’s team coordinator to start working on their official website which will be hosted on http://www.verdes.bz  so go over and sign up if you want to know when the site is up.  We are in the process of receiving content for the site and as soon as everything is finalized the site will be uploaded as we already have the design ready.

Go Verdes!!

What the hell!!! I think one of the most exciting matches ever!  Hankook Verdes my very own home team vs one of Mexico’s Power houses in football!

and how are we to do this? in the Concacaf Champions League, no less. While i had hoped for a smaller team, as luck would have it Belizeans would face up against Mexicans in the second competition for the year.

Though I think that Cruz Azul is not playing all that great, even if they finished runner up this season… i think they were not playing as cohesively as the greater Cruz Azul teams.  Never the less nobody can dispute they are one of the biggest team in Mexico.  And imagine they will come to the Norman Broaster Stadium!!!  Of course i’ll be there to cheer Verdes along.

In fact, bigup to the Mexican fan who contacted me through the blog and asked if we plan to go to see the game in Cruz Azul’s Estadio Azul.  We are already making plans and i think some of my cousins, friends & my brothers will definately make the trip.

As soon as i find out exact dates and where we can get tickets, (hopefully online on ticketmaster) i’ll let you know.  I’ll aslo be giving away a ticket to the Game at Mexico to the first Belizean Verdes fan that posts a reply on this blog thread.

Go Verdes!! Go Belize!!

After 22 years!! finally for all Verdes fans the wait is over!

Verdes won the league in dramatic fashion yesterday.

In what could only be considered a dose of their own medicine, B.D.F lost at their own game: Defense.

From the begining of the game, Verdes came out determined to end the 22 years draught.  Within minutes… Daniel Jimenez handed a pass to his brother Orland “Leech” Jimenez, the big hero of the game (though he was injured from the previous games, he showed grit and came out to play and win). Leech did not waste that pass and put the ball to the right hand side of the net.. pass veterean goalkeeper Charlie Slusher.

Verdes continued pushing, but alas, the second goal was not to come… but it didn’t matter… the 1-0 was enough for the BIG, BIG, Win. 

The second half was a different ball game, looks like the coach told the team to forget playing football and just play like the were defending their nation in war. And this they did, eventhough the B.D.F were a threat during the entire second half, Verdes played one of the most physical matches ever, ask the B.D.F they were on the receiving end, with as much as 3 of their players getting injured.  It also reflected when the referee gave a red card to one of the central defenders, after dishing out to yellow cards for the same play… is that possible?

But finally the Big whistle came, and it was juvelation inside the Norman Broaster Stadium… Verdes had finally won the title… the fans were exhilourous…as they had been a great support during the duration of the game.  The players were so happy that most of them were crying…. What a day for Cayo, What a day for Verdes.  They are now on to the big stage to UNCAF’s new Champion’s League format.

Congratulations big time to everyone who did their part… Sergio Chuc .. their manager, The coach, The Fans and most importantly the greatest players of this era: Daniel Jimenez, Orlando JImenez, Ricardo Jimenez, Shamir Pacheco, Wilhem “Locho” Coye (who was the player of the match), Stanley “Rice” Robinson, Eduardo Monroy, Jamie Brooks (who is on the road to being one of Belize’s best goalkeepers), and of course the defensive line up.  What a Game Guys, What a season.